Somehow the bf’s sis managed to convince me that it “would be nice” if we meaning me, the bf and the rest of the squatters go on holiday together. I like to think I agreed because I wanted to build the relationships within our humble abode, but I realize now that the more likely reason was that I am just phenomenally stupid. Especially considering the sponger (the sister’s bf) would be joining us). For those of you who don’t know me and the referred to sponger are the best of friends… Okay I am lying but as mentioned before he has no job or any drive to ever find one for that matter.
Mere minutes after we arrived at the fabulous Mamagalie lodge , I began to get an inkling of precisely how tooth-grindingly long the week would be. We had just finished unpacking my vastly overloaded bakkie when the sponge started complaining about everything imaginable. He is of course a professional complainer which is probably part of the reason that he can’t find a job to save his pathetic little life.
Now me and the sponge can take each other in small doses but actually having to spend an entire weekend communicating is something that was just not gonna happen. Especially with the bf around who possibly resents the little rat more than I do. And of course the complaints seem never ending when one is trying to relax.
However all parties concerned I think it turned out to be a fairly good holiday what with the blunders and all. I am assuming that you want to read about the memorable events on the trip and I promise not to complain to much in this part however if you prefer the complaining bitch skip to the end of the blog.
Firstly the accommodation was absolutely beautiful and the bedrooms stunning. Bedrooms that were apparently off bounds this weekend as we had zip, zero, nada, nil, privacy what-so-ever… Even with the romantic for postar red satin bed… We did however take advantage of it even with all the interruptions. Every single time for those of you who really want to know. The sister and the bf were apparently too scared to mess up the beautiful bedding… You’re in the middle of the mountains in a luxurious four star log cabin for Christ’s sake who cares about the bedding! But maybe I am just a non-caring bitch.
Anyway we did manage to scare the shit out of the sponge with a cleverly devised prank that left him screaming like a banshee whilst hopping from foot to foot. The sight was absolutely hilarious and I am deeply disappointed that I did not have the camera in place to film the event. In a nutshell the bf hid under a bed that was in front of their door he scratched on the door whilst I kept them occupied thinking that he (the bf) was with me. When the sister sent her whimpering (no kidding) bf to check what was going on my bf grabbed his leg which produced the above mentioned leprechaun effect.
Then there was the 3 hour hike into nowhere. We were trying to go to the lodges advertised rock pools but to get there is supposedly an hours hike but after being lost in the wilderness for about 2 hours and following the correct trail for an hour, through a maze of dangerous arachnids and the like, we decided to head back to the lodge. As a side note the trip back took us about 30 min, probably as we just wanted to get away from the gigantic spiders.
Once back at the lodge someone had the brilliant idea of horse riding, unfortunately I believe it was me. So we phoned the owner of the lodge, who said it was about 7kms away. Now I donno what he was smoking but I would chew my own arm off if that was 7kms it took us an hours drive before we pulled into a farm which looked like something out of the hills have eyes. We then waited an hour before the ranch hand arrived to take us on a trail.
Now this was an experience that I am never going to forget. We all mounted the horses and it was time to hit the trail. Being somewhat nervous I decided to stay at the back of the group. Bad idea. The sisters bf had no clue how to ride a horse. After about 20min of tip toeing behind him I’d had enough and overtook… Now he is absolutely terrified of chickens. I know you’re laughing… But we all have our phobia’s… Anyway the trail we were following lead us straight through a pack of them… And me being the generous person I am slowed down so the sisters bf could keep up… LOL! In other words I nearly came to a standstill to watch the sponge squirm and shriek for a while longer amongst the chickens. I know I am evil but I am female so it is genetically programmed into me.
I caught up to the rest of the group and after about 15 min was asked to check where he was. Now proof that horses can be evil too. The sponge’s horse had decided to walk about 15m off the trail into the middle of a chicken pen whilst walking the above said sponge into every tree he could possibly find. Now for proof that I am not too evil I went to go fetch the evil horse and drag him out of the pen.
Anyway all in all it was actually a great holiday. And the drive back was somewhat pleasurable with a stop in Harties. To stretch the legs and refill our stomach’s we made it back home unscathed.